How Compassionate Are You...To Yourself?

How compassionate are you to others? When a family member or loved one is in pain or sick, do you want to help them in some way? What if they lose their job? Are you inclined to offer words of support and encouragement and let them know how valuable they are and that you’re there for them if they need you? Why is that? Because you’re caring. You have empathy. You have love in your heart.

How compassionate are you to yourself? What happens when you set a goal for yourself, and you don’t live up to your expectations? Do you talk to yourself the way you would talk to your friend or your loved one? Or do you tell yourself you should have done better and start judging yourself?

How can we change that? It begins with the Meet and Greet. We meet the feelings, realize they’re there, and then greet them with a reminder of how valuable, worthy, powerful, and compassionate we truly are. While our minds may be trying to tell us that the old behaviors of our past are what define us, we can meet that voice, greet it by telling it, “Oh heck, no! I’m continuing to choose to make myself into a better version of me each and every day!”

That is the definition of success: knowing that we are a work in progress and gifting ourselves with self-compassion.

The next time you start to judge yourself, ask yourself a question: “What would I say if this were my friend instead of me?” Bonus: This also works in our recovery too!

Let’s Stay Connected

If this resonates with you, I’d really love to know. You can comment below or email me. You’re also invited to join other Bookenders on Reddit.

And if you’re looking for deeper exercises, I wrote Bookends of Recovery & Healing Workbook to help you heal from betrayal trauma and addiction by using creative exercises, action tools, and guided reflection.

Warmly,
Laura 🌻