Understanding & Identifying Triggers

When you’re in the recovery and healing world, you’re going to hear the word “trigger” all the time. Unfortunately, it’s one of those words that’s also become overused on social media. That doesn’t mean it’s lost validity in our space, though. In fact, identifying our triggers is a crucial part of our recovery and healing process.

I understand how overwhelming this can feel, so be gentle with yourself as you’re learning about and understanding your triggers.

Over the coming weeks, I’ll be doing a series on triggers.

So, what is a trigger? These vary from person to person depending on our DOC or what we’re healing from. They're usually uncontrollable, emotional responses caused by a specific stimulus around us that makes us want to use our DOC or engage in our addictive or unhealthy behavior.

I’ve been on both sides of the coin. Both on the recovery and healing side, I’ve been triggered to use my DOC or engage in unhealthy behaviors and had to learn coping skills and ways to manage my triggers when they hit.

My trigger "top ten list" had some unusual things like red and white straws (I used coke with them) and the movie Bolt (my ex-husband took an affair partner to see it), so triggers really can be just about anything big or small.

The cool thing is, when we understand our triggers, knowing how to navigate through them early in our recovery saves us so much stress and anxiety. And it helps us maintain our sobriety and can help keep us from spiraling when our brain decides it wants to whisper all those negative things to us and all we're trying to do is go about our day in peace.

The Science of Triggers

Let's get a little technical and start with the science first.

Triggers can mimic "threats" to the brain. This can cause the fight-or-flight response to activate unnecessarily. This happens because our brain’s reward (dopamine) and stress systems get rewired during addiction and prolonged states of trauma.

The good news is that our brains are malleable. (Yay! A chance to use my favorite word!)

This means our brains can be rewired...and retrained. This is fantastic news for those of us in recovery and healing. We’re not powerless, as was once thought. Like I was told at the beginning of my recovery journey.

Now we know, all these decades later, that our brains can create new, healthy pathways to travel. The more we travel those pathways, the more the old ones fall away. See ya old ways of thinking!

We can encounter different kinds of triggers:

External:

• Situational

• Environmental

Internal:

• Emotional

• Mental

Some of the most common triggers for those in recovery and healing:

Stress and anxiety: We can’t avoid them. We’d love to, but it’s a part of life. Instead of letting stress and anxiety bog us down, we need to find tools that can help us reduce them.

Some tools to consider adding to your toolkit:

• Grounding techniques

• Breathing

• Exercise

• Setback Prevention Plan

• Sleep Hygiene

Emotional Pain: When we no longer have our DOC to numb our pain, or as we start to examine our hurt and trauma, emotional pain may play a big part in our journey. Especially if we're navigating partnerships, strained family and friend relationships.

Tools that may help:

• Counseling

• Life coaching

• Support groups

• Meetings

• Sober Circle/Healing Hive

Social Settings: We may experience anxiety and unease when we’re around a place where we used our DOC, or that’s connected to the people or things we used to.

The same can happen with our healing if we see a picture or even smell something that brings back a memory.

Physical exhaustion or illness: We may not realize it, but being tired after withdrawal has passed can make us more susceptible to our triggers. So can living with an active addict. It can be mentally and physically exhausting, and we may not even notice because we've become so used to it over time. That’s why I like to mention HALT (hungry, angry, lonely, tired) and BLAST (bored, lonely, angry, stressed, tired) whenever we talk about triggers. Do your best to notice when you're not feeling well. Treat yourself like one of your favorite plants: feed and water yourself...and give yourself some sunlight!

Identify Triggers:

Identifying triggers can take time. Sometimes, something may trigger you, and it will be a complete surprise. Not only is that okay, it’s normal. As you’re figuring out your triggers, be gentle with yourself and take your time.

Here are some ways to help get you started:

Tracking Patterns: Keep a "trigger diary" to identify recurring themes.

Reflection: Journal about situations or emotions that cause discomfort or urges.

Mind-Body Awareness: Recognize physical sensations like a racing heart or a tight chest that happen with emotional triggers.

Seeking Feedback: Ask your accountability partner (not your relationship partner) trusted friends, sponsors, life coach, or counselor for insight.

Managing Triggers

One of the toughest things when it comes to triggers is knowing how to handle and manage them. One of the great things about triggers is that there are many different ways to manage them.

Here are just a few:

• Urge Surfing

• Deep breathing and grounding exercises

• Practicing mindfulness

• Developing and relying on a strong Sobriety Circle or Healing Hive

• Meetings and Groups

• Utilize resources

• Using tools like a Setback Prevention Plan

As we learn how to identify and navigate our triggers, we lessen their control over us. We’re putting ourselves back in the driver’s seat. We may not always get to choose what pops into our minds or what triggers us, but we can learn how to respond when it happens.

We’re also learning how powerful we are in the process. In that power, we’re learning how to heal and grow, not just in recovery and healing but in ourselves.

Let’s Stay Connected

If this resonates with you, I’d really love to know. You can comment below or email me. You’re also invited to join other Bookenders on Reddit.

And if you’re looking for deeper exercises, I wrote Bookends of Recovery & Healing Workbook to help you heal from betrayal trauma and addiction by using creative exercises, action tools, and guided reflection.

Warmly,
Laura 🌻